Chaviva's PSA: GET HEALTHY! - PART 2

Shloms to my homes. That's my new lingo for "Shalom to my good blog readers." Get down with the Chavi lingo!

Anywho, I wanted to update everyone on my medical happenings, because I visited my sock-it-to-you doctor this morning. She was just as feisty as before, although luckily the test results came back, and she didn't have too much to be angry/worried/concerned about.

I'm happy to say that (almost) everything came back completely normal, if not excellent. My cholesterol and thyroid and blood count were great, with the doc commenting that she wished she had my cholesterol level. It also appears I need more Vitamin D, but she assured me that just about everyone in the U.S., especially in the Northeast in the winter, has low Vitamin D levels. The only downer was the results of the fasting/glucose test. Now, the results weren't horrible, but here's the deal. After you fast, they have you drink the gross soda, then make you sit for one hour, then another, testing your levels at both intervals. At the second hour, your level should be between 75 and 139 mg/dl. Mine, unfortunately, was at 141. This puts me on the very, very low end of "impaired glucose tolerance." To be a full-blown diabetic, those numbers would be greater than 200. So, let's just say I'm pleased that I'm only two mg/dl on the bad side of things. The doc said it isn't anything to be really worried about, that I'm not at death's door, but that I have one option: lose weight, eat better. So she's setting me up with an appointment with the "diabetes educator," whatever that is. My dad has diabetes, and I grew up with us going on and off the "diabetic diet" (picture mom scooping out green beans and everything else with measuring cups, super fun). The upside is I only have to see the educator once, and it's only to make sure I know what I'm doing and that I'm doing it right. Lose weight, eat right, and diabetes won't eat your body up and make you die from some horrible diabetes-related cause. My dad lost two aunts to diabetes-related complications, and countless other relatives on his side suffer from the craptastic glucose giant. I, however, will not be one of those people.

So that's what's new with my medical woes. I also had a EKG, for no apparent reason. I also might be visiting a cardiologist for a completely arbitrary and infrequent chest pain I've been getting since 9th grade social studies. It's funny how we can remember very specific moments in time like that. I was sitting next to Christina, or was it Russ? I stood up at the end of class at the bell, and for some reason, this really sharp pain struck the very center of my chest. It knocked the wind out of me and I plopped back down in my chair. I sat there for about 2 minutes, unable to move without feeling the horrible pain. I went to the doctor, thinking I was having some early-onset heart attack stuff, and the doctor just told me I probably pulled a muscle. Who'da thunk you could pull a muscle in your chest just by standing up? My current doctor doesn't buy it and because the pain persists once every three months or so at completely arbitrary points, she wants to make sure it isn't more serious. The EKG came back fine, so who knows.

Do I sound like a walking ball of disease and impending doom? I swear I'm not a hypochondriac. In fact, these are all things I've been dealing with for a long time; I'm just really stubborn and don't go to the doctor until they're all sort of bugging me at once. Then I sound like I'm one of those people who sits on WebMD researching all the various ailments they have. I'm not that person, I promise.

Anyway, let this be an even greater reminder to y'all to schedule appointments, get yourself checked out, and be as HEALTHY as YOU can be in 2010! Darn't! Or else. Don't make me come over there ...

Chaviva's PSA: GET HEALTHY!

I'm a big fan of full-disclosure of the most random things here on this blog, so I thought I'd share with you a really entertaining (and sort of unfortunate) X-Ray I received today of my knees! I've been dealing with a certain amount of knee pain over the past two years after injuring myself in late January 2008 (read about it in this post), and I have been stubbornly not trying to take care of it. Walking up stairs, my knee makes the  most hideous and mind-blowing crackling noise -- like bones rubbing against bones in every which way -- and the pain I experience is always on a very high level. When I was in Israel, it was really bad, and the day-to-day ranges from no pain (like today when I sit around all day) to tons of pain (lots of stairs and long distances). So, after visiting with my new General Doctor last week, and her slapping me upside the head with my health woes (sleep, TMJ, stomach woes, knees, etc), I was referred to about six different physicians. One of them? An ortho person. So today, I went, and I found out my knees look like this:

A normal Right Knee?

Yes, those are my kneecaps. And yes, they're sitting WAY off to the side. They're meant to sit in those little grooves, not off to the side, hanging out in their own little bubble of stupidity. But I'm sort of like the opposite of a bow-legged person, I'm a knob-kneed person. The way to treat this? Lots and lots and lots (and LOTS) of physical therapy. Then more visits to the Ortho, and more physical therapy. Hopefully, someday, my knees will re-migrate to their designated posts. Maybe if I migrate to Israel they'll migrate to their little cozy knee spots.

At any rate, this has been one ridiculous medical day. The X-Rays topped off the day that was started by spending three hours in a doctor's office having blood drawn. I managed to fill nine vials all together with blood. I even got to drink this disgustingly sweet Orange Soda (OU kosher!) and then sit in a waiting room and wait. It was thrilling, just thrilling. Come Monday, I should know whether I have a thyroid issue, diabetes, and a host of other medical problems. Let's hope they all come out negative.

The point? You guys -- all of you -- whether you're feeling healthy or not, need to get your health issues in order. I take after my mother with my phobia of doctors. Why? Because if you go to the doctor, they'll tell you what's wrong with you, and then you'll have to pay for it to be fixed, and deal with the life-long affects of having to change the way you live, medicate, and more. That's a lot to take. So better live in ignorance, right? NOT. You have to set up your life so you know what your kids can expect -- look at it that way. The more you know, the more they know, the more your grandkids know. The more everyone can prepare for hearth disease, cancer, diabetes, etc. So if you haven't been in for a physical, just go. Deal with it. Suck it up. Make yourself healthy. Make 2010 the Year of Healthy Living! Lose some weight, work out, eat more fresh and colorful foods, and feel better about yourself.

If Chaviva can do it -- begrudgingly as all hell -- so can you. To motivate you, take another look at my unfortunately jacked-up knee caps. Then call your physician and get your tuches on the move to health!

A quick ditty on my way to bed.

This is part of that 8 percent of my blog that isn't necessarily "on topic" as far as being about Judaism. But really, well, it is, since just about everything in my life relates in some way to my Jewishness. Prepare for utter irrelevance and general blabber.

So I went to the dermatologist today after having put off a small procedure for months and months. It was quick doing, but required a little procedure that means I have to replace some bandages on three different spots for about the next two weeks until said spots are healed. Barring any tests coming back positive or weird, this is just routine for the sake of being safe (I'll just say it has to do with my moles/beauty marks, of which I have about as many as the stars are numerous and the Jews are bountiful).

As I was laying there with the doctor asking me the typical questions (What do you do? Oh you're leaving? What will you study?). He asked why I'd put off coming in for so long and I explained that it was because after my ex and I broke up, I worried about being able to do the bandaging since I didn't have anyone around to help. Then he started asking how I came to Judaism and the first thing he said was, "So was your boyfriend Jewish?" He couldn't see my face, but I grinned that "seriously" kind of grin and said "Nope." He responded with the "Oh, well, everyone I know who has converted to Judaism did it for marriage" line. I said that, yeah, typically, a lot of converts to Judaism tend to be those who do it for spousal reasons, but that we are the few, the proud, who convert purely out of a personal calling. Now, I know plenty of people who convert for marriage end up being more devout than there spouses and I'm not knocking anyone here, but I just think it's interesting that he'd assume!

Of course, my real irritation with the entire visit was that he decided to do the procedure differently so as to make things easier on me since I am a poor, defenseless, helpless lass without a man or other person around to help me take care of the bandaging. After he left the nurse shook her head and explained a few easy ways to get things done -- "I've been all alone and had plenty of excisions, you'll be fine" she explained, with a grin and sarcastic tone in her voice.

At any rate, that's just a little ditty about what I'm medically up to. Not that anyone cares, but, well, someone might.